Ok, ok I admit it...I absolutely love this movie. Say what you will about Pee Wee Herman: he's weird, sick, perverted, etc. And you're probably right about all of them at this point, but back when I was a kid, this movie was DA BOMB and so was his TV show "Pee Wee's Playhouse." Basically this movie is about an overgrown kid who loses his pimped-out bike and all the hijinks that ensue as he tries to find get it back. Sounds weird? Believe me, it is...but it's hilarious. So this morning on my drive to work I was thinking about 5 things I've learned from this goofy movie...and here they are:
1. White-Collar Crime Will Never Die
Early in the movie you get to meet Pee Wee's nemesis, Francis, another man-child who is super-rich but really only wants Pee Wee's bike. I mean, you'd figure someone with Francis' dough would be able to get his own version of the bike and even - dare I say it - make it better than Pee Wee's...but of course not, he just steals Pee Wee's and then pays someone to cover it up. Was Francis a metaphor for Enron, et al.? Whoooo knooooows!
2. Don't Hitchhike...ever
This applies to two instances in the movie, the first is when Pee Wee is picked up by this escaped convict named Mickey...what was he in the clink for? Cutting the tag off a mattress (I told you this was a goofy movie). At one point they cross-dress their day past a police roadblock, then Pee Wee almost kills them by nodding off and driving the car off a cliff. Later in the movie, Pee Wee is picked up by this spooky, grizzled old trucker lady named Large Marge who can contort her face into a straight-up crazy wonder of claymation. And, of course, Pee Wee later finds out she was a ghost. Large Marge is awesome...for those of you who love this movie, how many times were you tempted to walk into a diner and say, "Large Marge Sent Me" ?
3. There is no Basement at the Alamo
Distraught over his bike being stolen, Pee Wee consults this wack psychic, who not only steals his wallet, but tells him that his bike is at the Alamo...in the basement. So Pee Wee makes his way to the Alamo, goes though the tour, and asks the uber-country tour guide when they get to see the basement. The lady tells him there is no basement in the Alamo and everyone laugh at him. So there you have it: when you're planning your big family vacation to San Antonio, don't expect to see a basement at the Alamo, or you'll be truly disappointed!
4. Godzilla + Santa Claus + The Beach + Twisted Sister = AWESOME
So Pee Wee finally finds his bike on a movie set and takes it back, being chased by security...he drives through a bunch of random movie sets, including Godzilla, a Santa Claus movie, some beach scene, and a Twisted Sister music video. It's so randomly bizarre and it makes me laugh every time. It's like one giant pop culture bonanza wrapped into one.
5. Don't be Afraid to be Childish
I'm not saying it's cool or smart to be immature all the time, but seriously: we spend so much of our lives at work and not much of our lives doing much else (not including sleeping), so you really have to enjoy it. Pee Wee Herman is an overgrown 8 year old pretty much, and while his life in the movie is idealistically bizarre and funny, it makes me think that not EVERYTHING has to be super-serious all the time. Don't be afraid to be silly, don't be afraid to laugh. As I said already, there's a time and place for it: if your boss is giving you your annual review and says you're unorganized, don't respond with a Pee Wee-esque "I know you are, but what am I?"
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